now i’m just rambling

I wanted to try and write something a little more cheery after yesterday’s festival of sadness and self-pity. Mainly because I personally really hate seeing such depressing stuff as my top post.

But I got nothing.

Okay, well, it is Friday right? Can’t be mad about that.

Except now I’m going to go into my laundry list of reasons for not being thrilled for this particular weekend. With the caveat that it is still definitely better than the work week, I just like to complain.

I get to go to the lab again for a poking tomorrow. I’m hoping just two vials this time though and preferrably not the big needle so I don’t look like a heroin addict on Monday, like I so often do. I don’t know why some phlebotomists feel the need to use the big needle on me, I have good veins, I don’t need the big needle! But I never speak up and tell them this because I’m kind of a doormat that hates confrontation. Also, I prefer not to question people who are about to stab me with the big needle.

The Superbowl is also depressing me in a, man, it is so awesome to feel depressed over something as trivial as sports, kind of way. Of course, it would be much more awesome if I were feeling excited for the Superbowl because the Niners were about to beat the Pats in it. As it is, I’m stuck cheering for the Giants – the team that broke my heart two short weeks ago! – and feeling like the truth is I’m not going to feel happy about the result of this game either way.

Like I said though, it actually does feel nice to feel depressed over a game instead of over whether or not I’ll ever achieve the one and only goal in my life that I had assumed would take zero effort to achieve.

But I’m not ready to get into all of that again, so instead a funny story from yesterday. I was driving home and Paul was checking his voicemail when he started laughing at a message. It turns out the flower shop he orders my Valentine’s Day flowers from every year was calling because they hadn’t gotten an order from him this year – he didn’t call them back so now they probably think we broke up haha!

In case you’re wondering why no flowers this year? I told him he didn’t need to. Sometimes I feel bad because I can be so unromantic and my husband loves surprises and flowers and all of that stuff, so I feel like I can just never give him the reaction he’s looking for. I think it’s really sweet, but it’s also just not something I feel like I need from him. This is going to sound all kinds of gross, but he is so amazingly sweet and thoughtful every day that there’s just not many more points he can score by going big a few days out of the year. The man cooks, cleans, works full time, goes shopping for me, wakes up at 4:30 a.m. to drop me off at the office (even though he starts at 8 a.m.!) and somehow also manages to never lose his temper even though he is married to a crazy person.

When we first started dating eight years ago, every. single. one. of my guy friends was predicting that he’d stop doing things, like opening the car door for me, within six months. Then when we got engaged a year and a half later and he was still opening the car door for me? They all said they were now sure it would end after the wedding.

(Incidentally, now you also know the apparent reason most men get married – so they don’t have to open the car door for you anymore).

Anyway, here we are five years later and I just have one thing to say, every single one of them was wrong. Every. Single. One.

The only thing wrong with this man is that he is attracted to me. But I can live with that.

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