I was going to write about more guilty feelings in relation to my mom and her desire to help and my desire for a little space but I think I need to take a break from all that.
Tomorrow I’ll be 34 weeks! From what I’ve read that’s the point where preemies have the same outcomes as full-term babies so even though I’d like to keep him cooking for another three weeks, getting here is a big, big relief.
It seems so surreal that my time as a pregnant lady are quickly winding down. It hasn’t been all sunshine and rainbows, and these past few weeks have had their share of anxiety and discomfort but for the most part I’ve really enjoyed being pregnant. I love this time where Cheeks has been all mine and I don’t have to share him with anyone. I’m the only one who knows where he likes to put his little feet (jammed under my right rib), how often he gets hiccups, how if I sleep in a certain position it makes him squirm and punch until I move.
And, ever since I got the steroid shots, I’m almost positive I’ve been able to feel him “breathing.” I started noticing this strange sensation of a rhythmic pulsing that definitely wasn’t hiccups because it was much more gentle. It sort of felt like a dog softly panting. After a bit of googling I’m convinced that it’s his back rising up and down while he practices his breathing! Hopefully this means he’ll be just fine to make a slightly early appearance.
His movements now are noticeably different from earlier in the pregnancy. I no longer feel kicking or jabbing, but a lot of squirming – I think because he’s run out of room! I’m hoping this means that he’ll have no other choice but to stay firmly head down like he is right now. I’m pretty sure his head is off to the left a little bit and that he’s somewhat diagonal based on the fact that his hiccups make the lower left half of my belly shake and those little feet that reside under my right ribs (as confirmed by my last few ultrasounds). I can’t remember if I mentioned but he turned at some point between ultrasound at 29 weeks and the one I had at 31 weeks, he’s been head down ever since which they check for at my NSTs.
One of my coworkers felt my belly and proclaimed that I’m “all baby.” I didn’t know what she meant until these past couple weeks when I’ve been able to feel distinct body parts as he pushes them out. I still can’t really tell what they are but it’s pretty neat. I haven’t really gained much weight in the past few weeks, I seem stuck around 20-21lbs. My appetite is actually pretty good but I just can’t eat very much at once! I think maybe my body is preparing me to have to feed someone every 2-3hrs because that seems to be how often I have to eat. I’ll be famished, eat a small meal, feel completely stuffed and then be starving again a few hours later. I guess this means he hasn’t dropped yet.
I still haven’t had much heartburn *knock on wood* and I never even really had much in the way of round ligament pain as far as I can tell. My biggest complaint is still back aches, which in the grand scheme of things, ain’t so bad. Oh the contractions aren’t great either, but I figure they are preparing me for the real thing so maybe I’ll be thankful for them in the end.