I know that I am making this a much scarier ordeal than it has to be, but frankly I'm scared! And I'm not sure why. Because I practically WAS a party planner of sorts for a year and a half. I mean I've done invitations, worked on seating charts, dealt with highly complicated guestlists...but this just feels so different. This is ALL on ME. My whole family and all my closest friends will be there. And they will know that I planned this day and if it totally sucks and they have no fun, it will be all my fault.

I know this is not a healthy attitude. I know that my family and closest friends probably won't care if I forget to order the cake or the favors are tacky (which, they won't be!) or if the whole thing just kind of generally sucks and is boring because they love me and they will see it as a day for me. But you know, I guess I'd still feel like I was letting them down even if they don't think that way. Yes, I know, I will get mental help at some point =)