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Leaving on a jet plane...
Okay, so...I'm freaking out a little bit here. It kind of just hit me that in just over a week I'll be in Paris. Somewhere. But I'm not quite sure where yet because our lease doesn't start until the 9th and I'll be arriving on the 6th. So, um, yeah. That's one thing I'm a little freaked out over. Another thing is I've been up north in the SF Bay Area all week and it is friggin' cold up here. Yesterday I put on some long underwear my mom bought for me to take to France and my sister just looked at me and shook her head because yes, I know, it's going to be even colder in Paris. And I'm seriously going to miss my cat. It's hard enough going two or three weeks without seeing her furry little face, four and a half months is just going to suck. The only other American girl in my program has an actual, honest-to-God baby who she's leaving with her parents while she's gone. I have no clue how she's going to do it because if that were me? I'd be a complete sobbing mess just thinking about it. Of course, I'm getting weepy over a cat so maybe I'm not exactly the picture of "strength." I'm not mentioning missing Paul, because duh! Obviously, I will miss him. But I do think this whole experience is both good and necessary, not because I want "freedom" before we get married, but more because I guess because I have something to prove to myself. I haven't really been totally single since I was in 8th grade and although I've lived by myself before, I can't say I lived a very healthy or responsible lifestyle while on my own. I constantly let food go bad because I was too lazy to cook. I let the laundry pile up because I didn't feel like lugging it down to the laundry room. Dirty dishes would start growing mold until I just threw them away because they were too disgusting to wash. And that's just the short list. I improved a bit living alone in the dorms this past semester but, let's be real about that...I was really only living at the dorms Sunday evening/Monday morning through Thursday afternoon. I only stayed in Turlock for one weekend. The rest of the time I either went home or to LA. And every time I went home for the weekend my mom would send me back to school with an entire cooler packed to the brim with fruits, veggies, and a bunch of Chinese dishes to last me through the week. I know all of this makes it sound like I am a complete nitwit for even thinking about going to France on my own, without any sort of support system at all there. And maybe I am. But I guess it's too late to do anything about it as the tuition has been paid, the flight has been booked, the apartment rented...not to mention I can't bear the thought of having to explain to people why I am unemployed and not in school rather than studying in Paris. Alright, I'm going to stop griping now and finish packing for my trip back to Los Angeles. I know I haven't been writing much of anything lately, but I swear, I'm working on something based on a WSJ article Paul sent me yesterday. Wait for it...wait for it...although, knowing me, I wouldn't hold your breath. I'll probably finish writing it, decide it sucks and then delete the whole thing without another word. Labels: France
Comments:
Maybe you should take some extra soap and some razors for the Frenchies! Just stand on a street corner while dodging car fires set by mad Muslims and hand out the toiletries. Just a thought.
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