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Rest in peace little girl...
My mom called me at work this morning and told me the baby died last night. I was stunned. You never imagine that this sort of thing will happen to people you know and love. My cousins (I consider my cousin-in-law to be just a regular cousin because to me the love she has shown our family means there is no qualifier needed) are such loving, devoted, family people who did so much for Paul and I while we lived in Los Angeles...I wish I could do something for them now but I'm afraid only God can heal the pain they must be feeling today. It's impossible for me to understand why God would allow such a horrible thing to happen to such a wonderful, God-fearing couple...but I suppose that is the beauty of faith. We don't have to understand why, we just have to believe that God's plan is for good no matter how things might seem at the moment. Baby J, I wish I had had the chance to meet you, but I'm thankful that your suffering is over now and that your little spirit is watching over all of us from Heaven. I look forward to meeting you up there someday little one. Labels: Death, family matters, God
Monday, November 10, 2008
So I'm back from yet another trip out of my beloved SF and as usual distance definitely makes the heart grow fonder. Although distance from my job did not make me love my job, it only prolonged my tolerance for it so that even though today sucked something awful, my head did not explode all over my Bl*oomberg keyboard. The wedding was wonderful, since I was in it I have no pictures but I'm sure Lian will provide them soon enough. Lian was, as expected, an absolutely gorgeous bride and I really hope there is a shot of the moment after James put the ring on her finger, because wow, what a look of pure joy on that boy's face. What I did not love? The totally effed up NY metro system. Having lived all my life in California, the first time I visited NYC I thought the subway system was the most amazing thing. Like ever. But after having lived in Paris and utilizing the metro system in Taipei and Hong Kong, wow, the NYC subway system is horrible, confusing and completely not tourist friendly. The subway lines seem to run on random schedules/routes when there's going to be a full moon or the tide is low or when it's the first weekend of the month or any other random reason you can possibly think of. Also: I hate humidity. I really hate humidity. And I really especially hate humidity when I have to wait in non-ventilated subway holes for trains that never seem to want to come. But anyway, I am home now and I'm exhausted and I'd like to not have to get on an airplane, well, ever, but I'll settle for a few months. And on a kind of downer note, my cousin's Eric and Mindy had their little baby girl (their son was the ring bearer at my wedding) on Friday but she is in the NICU with heart trouble and possibly some other complications. It sounds like it touch and go at the moment, so please keep her and the whole family in your prayers... Labels: family matters, vacation
Monday, September 29, 2008
So after finally being released from my soggy prison, I feel kind of bad about what I wrote yesterday. My grandpa is a sweet old dude and it's not his fault he has Alzheimer's and is driving me nutso - someday that could easily be me right so who am I to say anything? I also think I figured out the psychology behind his fear of me being another "helper" - his kids (my step-uncles and aunts) totally suck and he's afraid that getting another helper is just another way for them to pawn him off on someone else. I came to this realization last night as I watched him dial his kids phone numbers over and over and over again for a half hour. The caretaker Ahnee told me that they never answer because they have caller ID and screen his calls. She also told me that his daughter never comes to visit despite literally living around the corner and that a couple of times she actually walked him over there to visit...one time the daughter wouldn't even answer the door and the other time she wouldn't let him come up but came down to chat with him for a little while. His two sons come once a week to give him his weekly allowance, they take them out to lunch but never stay and chat no matter how much he begs them to. On the other hand, my mom and assorted aunts and uncles take turns coming from the US to make sure they never go too long without having at least one of them around. Ahnee told me in Chinese that "his kids don't care about him, not like grandma's kids." Even my grandmother with her Alzheimer's is aware of the difference and when he asks who I am she'll answer, "This is my grand-daughter, she's come to visit me, unlike your kids and grandkids who never come visit you." It comes off as pretty mean so I'm glad he can't seem to hear her most of the time. It bothered me so much after talking to Ahnee that I had trouble sleeping and ended up calling my mom in the middle of the night. She said they never even went to visit much when their own mother (my grandpa's first wife) was dying of cancer so she doesn't expect much from them now. I know he had a hand in raising them and so perhaps it is partly his "fault" that they are the way they are, but from what I know of him (he's been married to my grandmother for 16 years so I knew him for a long time before his mind started to deteriorate) he's a generous man who loves his family very much so I'm not sure how his kids turned out to be a bunch of heartless vultures who are just waiting for him to die so they can divvy up the booty. My mom said one of their main objections against him marrying my grandmother was their fear that he would die first and she would inherit the apartment - nevermind the fact that he helped all of them buy their homes and they're all pretty well off on their own now. And nevermind that my grandmother gives him companionship when they would rather leave him to die alone and lonely. It just really shocks me to see people treat their elderly parents this way...especially in Asian culture where not only are you normally supposed to take care of your parents when they're old you're actually supposed to take care of them by living with them. Ah well, what goes around comes around right? I'm sure their own kids are learning a lesson right now in how to treat them when they're old and fading mentally. Labels: family matters, taiwan
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